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Michael D Housewright
  • Housewrighter
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To Juliet on Our Tenth Anniversary

This one has taken me a while to imagine and even longer to write. I suppose we will always struggle with verbal communication as our relationship grows more profound into the unspoken and the need for words diminishes. It became clear to me while we were driving from Brownwood back to DFW a couple of weeks ago that we have indeed lived some adventures over the years. I had always believed that living an adventurous life would slow the course of time, or at least the perception that time is moving. In some ways it has. Our many travels have revealed parts of the planet that we could not have understood without traveling there and have shown us parts of ourselves that were not yet visible without the experience of travel. However, I cannot help but feel the weight of age, even at a reasonably young age, and the knowledge that we have been married for ten years.

Perhaps my greatest joy in reflecting on these 3650 days is that I long for more. And unlike at the beginning where the longing was for travel, experiences and personal success, the desire now is simply for time with you. I think many couples become accustomed to time apart from their spouses. They have girls' and boys' weekends. They travel for work often. They split tasks to manage their kids. I can certainly grasp the appeal in those particular types of marriages. But we are not in those categories. I do not intend to disparage other people's needs and choices here, but voluntary time apart is merely unappealing and unfulfilling for me. You are the muse to my madness. Your smile widens each night as the days fall away through the course of our meals and our bottles of wine. The time we have together is where ideas are born, plans are hatched, and our connection is deepened.

I realize these letters over the years are pretty one-sided. There are probably people out there that believe that I am a needy asshole and that you might benefit from some "alone time." We both know that the door is always open and that the life we have here is indeed a choice. At the same time, I do my best to ask you where your feelings are and what needs should be addressed regularly. It always seems to come back to sleep and alone together time to get you fully recharged. For me, it is, and likely always will be, being on the adventure of marriage with you. We do not have kids. We have wrestled with that since the beginning ten years ago. And we have likely at least a few more years to decide what course of action to take in that arena. For now, no pets, no property, and no obligations but love and trust in the paths we are choosing.

Ten years for us - Our 19th trip to Italy together happens in a couple of weeks. Perhaps our Italian life is our child or at least our pet. We have visited 31 countries together since 2007, and that list will likely grow again this year. We have so many possibilities on the horizon, and yet they are imbued with an edge of uncertainty. This likely more how I like it than how you would prefer it. At the same time though, every time we shut the engines down awhile we both become intolerably grumpy. I don't want to be grumpy. But perhaps we will get better. Maybe the dream is to reach the next space in life. We have had these life chapters, and they are better than fiction. The story can bog down at times, but there is always resolution, poetry, intrigue, and climax. Is there a better way to write a novel?

In conclusion, since this is now bordering on long-form prose, the ten years since we married have been the most pivotal and enlightening days of my life. I hold out hope that we will continue this journey. I dream each night that I will keep waking up with you and that our lives will only become more precious with joy while becoming more open and charitable as well. Thank you for marrying me ten years ago. Thank you for agreeing to do it over again hundreds of times since that warm day in Austin, Texas. I love you more than the sum of every part of everything I have loved before or since I met you.

Yours always,

Michael

Two and Nature
tags: juliet housewright, md housewright, michael housewright, anniversary, love
categories: Juliet
Tuesday 04.30.19
Posted by Michael Housewright
 

Why The World Cup Matters to Me

I've watched plenty of World Cup in this Town

Why the World Cup matters to me, is something I have pondered for over a month as the big event drew nearer. This is my first World Cup since 1998 that I will not be in Europe for at least part of it. It was strange not watching yesterday's USA-Ghana match in a place with a huge screen and raucous fans. I have seen matches in bars in Connemara Ireland, and along the Mosel in Trier, Germany. I have watched on ferries to Sardinia, the streets of Tuscany, and alone, in a big empty apartment, after a train ride from Switzerland. No matter the locale, rarely does a match fail to create a goose-bump inducing moment.

The question posed on a major US sports talk show today was: Why should we(America) care if soccer is ever a major sport in this country? It was clear when listening to the hosts, that they believed it never will be a major sport in our country. I think otherwise, and not only do I believe it will one day be on par with our great American traditions, I think it must. To those of you who feel otherwise, and I am sure there are many, let me offer the following suggestion. Stand on a piazza and look out over a town, in a country with no powerful army, and abject unemployment, while the people fill the streets after an amazing win in world cup. Watch the elation and the solidarity overcome so many, with seemingly very little hope, and the answer becomes obvious. This sport is a unifying entity, and a vehicle for us all to share in our common humanity. Before the UN, NATO, and the G(pick a number of the week), there was Soccer, Futbol, Calcio,Fußball, فوتبال, 足球, サッカー, and футбол.

I am watching here this year, longing for the moments I likely took for granted. At the same time, I feel something moving under the talented feet of these talented ambassadors of nations. It feels something like hope, and close to acceptance. Soccer did not choose to become global because of World Cup, it was global, and therefore, World Cup happened. Kids, a ball (often a shabby piece of something formed from garbage and desire), and some semblance of end lines is all it takes to create a life above misery, in so many places around the globe. All our science, all our sports technology used for creating competitive advantage, pales in comparison to the want to play a game that is often the only joy or respite from a very difficult life. One of my favorite soccer terms is "the equalizer", and it is a lovely metaphor for the class bridge the sport has become. However, I do not watch the sport for charity, or because it's nice to see the poor kids sing in the church choir. I watch because I love to feel the hair stand on my arms when an occasional miracle finds the net. I watch because I know these matches are celebrations of our most common passions as human beings. The games are much like living, passing from place to place, setting up "chances" for the moments that make up the best of our days. I watch because I travel in my head to all those places I have watched, to all those people I have met, and to the absolute knowledge I am a better person for doing it.

I have already begun to wonder where I will be in 4 years when the cup goes to Russia. I have a pretty good idea that It will be somewhere with a TV, and people I do not know, caring about a match that for 90 minutes, is far bigger than all our joint woes. This is why the World Cup matters to me.

tags: Adventure, md housewright, Soccer, Stories, The Housewrighter, Travel, World Cup
Tuesday 06.17.14
Posted by Michael Housewright
 

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