At the 11th Hour last week Juliet and I decided to return to Colorado for 13 weeks prior to our big Europe journey beginning in May. Our reasons are many and suffice it to say, this was a gut-wrenching decision.
We left Houston, TX at 2 PM Friday and made stops in The Woodlands to see Juliet's sis and children, Fairfield, TX for a pasta dinner with my Dad and Swipey (along with some Beaux Freres) and an overnight stay.
At 9 AM Saturday morning we visited my grandmother, slammed some sausage Kolaches and my last donut for at least the next 5 months.
At 11 AM we arrived in Ennis, TX to my Mom and DC's to pack our car.
At 12:58 PM we left Ennis, TX and drove to Saginaw, TX to visit Juliet's sister and future bro-in-law where we enjoyed the largest Chinese buffet I have ever seen.
At 2 PM Saturday we arrived in Saginaw, TX
At 3:30 PM we departed for Denver 865 miles from Saginaw.
After debating stops in Dumas, TX and Dalhart, TX we decided to continue driving. The pervasive aroma of disgusting cattle feces and the disheartening prices of motels along the route kept us driving north.
At 12:25 am we crossed Raton pass and into Colorado. At this point we had to keep going as Denver and our "free" hotel were only 240 miles from us.
After Chinese food at 3pm and 5 very large glasses of iced tea (between us) the only foods Juliet and I consumed the rest of the night were the following : (all from convenience stores)
A Tijuana Mama Pickled Sausage
A stale piece of Cracker Barrel Extra-Sharp Cheddar (not finished)
One sip of a 3 month out of date bottle of unsweet tea (why unsweet? wtf?!!) It tasted like the inside of a refrigerator that had been left unplugged for a year. Bottle was returned to the store for
A 20oz V8 original with extra sodium
A few bottles of water
A very freezer burned F'Real Cappuccino Milkshake.
At least 4 pieces of gum (just Juliet)
Some stale Buc-ee's Mixed Popcorn (caramel, cheddar, and butter)
Some Multi-Grain Crackers to add a health factor
At 3:30 AM Sunday we arrived at the Lakewood, Colorado Extended Stay America. This place was provided by Juliet's employer and it is without question the skeeziest shithole either of us have ever stayed. We are escaping this fuckpile today if it costs us every penny in the bank. What a disgusting place to lay our head after 36 hours of driving madness.
At least I got a damned Grand-Slam Breakfast at 3:55 AM just to complete a total drive of shit-food and make a fond morning of imbalanced rectal discharge.
At least it is a beautiful day today here in Colorado and the hipsters at Crema are providing their usual brand of corny, esteem-damaged humor.
At the end of this I am really happy to be here and cannot wait to find a place to live that does not host regular tapings of COPs so that I can work.